In 2004, a mutual fund company sent Doug a pecan pie for Christmas. I never liked pecan pie.. until this pie. My mother-in-law, Ruth, was staying with us as we had a new baby and she and I devoured the pie and then for months I made pies and we taste tested them to see if we could make one as good or better than the one that was sent.
Eventually, I did create an amazing pecan pie recipe and over the years, I would make the pie for her for special occasions. In fact, before she got to a place where she wasn’t physically able, she would gather, sort and crack pecans and then I would make the pies with the fresh pecans.
I bet we each gained twenty pounds due to those pies over the years.
We never did get another one of those pies. Until this year. Opening the box was bittersweet.
Ruth died in the fall of 2019 and since I had hip surgery the week before Thanksgiving last year, the holidays passed without me making pecan pies. Opening the plastic on the pie was nostalgic. Ruth and I had a strained relationship at times… she could be difficult. But over the years we did things together and built traditions.
And so, I ate a piece of that pie in memory of Ruth.
And since I had already bought the ingredients and planned on doing so.. I made one too.
And I’ll enjoy eating it too.
And then I’ll run, cause that is a lot of really bad calories. But man it tastes good. 🙂
This is an unsolicited product review. I’m not getting anything in return for this post. I just want to support my friends Sara and Tametha who sell Color Street. I just love this product that much.
I haven’t had pretty nails in years. Lots and Lots of years. As a mom and teacher, there wasn’t time or money for a lot of years.. and then for the last twelve years I taught art..and spending money on pretty nails made no sense at all as they would last less than a day.
But with my new job came an opportunity to have pretty nails, and in perfect timing, one of my friends invited me to her Color Street party. I’d heard about these little gems before, but had never tried them. So when Sara told me about them, I thought hmm.. I’ll get them a try. And I fell in love!!
I absolutely love that there isn’t any dry time! I love that there are lots of choices and that they last for a couple of weeks. Even cooler, one package is between $11 and $14 and I can get between two and three manicures out of one package! And Kylie’s little fingers can get like 6! It’s pretty fun.
I liked them so much, I thought I’d host a party… but then another one of my friends Tametha, signed up to sell as well! So instead of having a party, I just buy from both friends.
So if you haven’t heard of Color Street, you should give them a try. It’s crazy. The strips are really nail polish.. just like 90% dry and you put them on like stickers and tada, you have painted nails. You can even mix and match the colors.
Today I put on “Night Terror” on my fingers, “Baton Rougey” on my toes and Kylie put on “Rustworthy” on her fingers.
We have a little stash and enjoy the variety, but my wish list is long! .
Aren’t these cute! Yep, these are on my wishlist. Oh and one more thing… Buy 3, Get 1 Free. Oh yes.
Let me start by saying that I’ve tried lots of different brands of makeup. I’ve always been a cheapo when it comes to makeup, but when I turned 40 a few-ish years ago, I decided that it was time to be an adult and buy more than just drugstore makeup.
So I did. And I’ve tried what feels like every brand.
I have SUPER sensitive dry skin, so much of what I’ve tried I’ve ended up sharing with my children.
I have friends that sell many types, styles and formularies. I’m not saying any of their brands are bad or inferior or anything like that… I’m just saying that I’ve found my brand of makeup. (I still use Young Living face cleaner and moisturizer though…) anyway.. If you need a recommendation for MaryKay, Beauty Counter, Young Living, and others, let me know and I’ll send you my squad links.
But for today, let me tell you about Seint. Until like last week it was called Maskara, but they rebranded themselves recently.
I’ve watched one of my friends sell Seint (https://purpleumbrella.seintofficial.com/en) for the last however long and thought it was interesting, but looked like a lot of work. Then one night I watched her facebook live… and yes my friends, that is why all of these direct sales women do facebook live videos.. and thought, I can do that.
So I got matched. How do you get matched?
Well, you take a picture of yourself with no makeup on in natural light and send it to your person. It wasn’t hard.
My person, Tara, sent me back this photo with a makeup template that includes where the colors go and the name of my matches for Contour, Highlight, Lip and Cheek, and Illuminator.
I have to say, looking at the image is a little intimidating for someone that isn’t into makeup!
After contemplating it for a few weeks, I finally purchased a few of the products. Well, enough to get a free compact. (Cause who doesn’t love FREE stuff.)
And I FELL IN LOVE.
It is so easy to use, forgiving and feels great.
And my face is happy.
So I ordered some for Lexi for her 16th birthday!
One of the things I like most about this product is the ease of use and the affordable price. Compared to many products that I’ve tried this is down right “cheap” and a little goes a long way.
And there you have it. If you are looking for a new product to try, give Tara a shout. The link is above, but I’ll post it here again. https://purpleumbrella.seintofficial.com/en She doesn’t know that I did this and there is no kickback to me. I just appreciate the products and want to support another mom.
Andrea McDonald has been a friend of mine for I guess almost 17 years. She’s one of those dynamos that conquers anything she decides to do. I chose her for a shoutout because she has an amazing photography business that she built from the ground up.. and then decided to start a side-gig as well!
So first I have to say, if you live within a couple of hours of Fort Worth/Dallas and need amazing photos, you should use Andrea. The pics that she has taken of my family are incredible. Her business is called Rooted in Love Photography. The url is rootedinlovephoto.com
These are of our family in 2016. Wow. I’m going to have to start saving for some new family pics. The investment is .Worth. it.
But these days I’m all about her hair product business! A few years ago, Andrea started using and promoting Monat hair products. I joined her facebook group and have watched her hair transform. Well, I last month, I decided that my hair had to have help. So I messaged Andrea and got started.
I can’t wait to see how amazing my hair is going to look in a year!
To answer your question. Yes, the products are expensive. But you only use a tiny bit at a time. And here is the biggest thing besides my hair looks SO MUCH BETTER… I don’t have to wash my hair all the time anymore. For the first time in my life, I can go 3 or 4 days between washings and even bigger, I don’t have to wash my hair after running! OMG. Not washing my hair and blow drying it and flat ironing it every morning is huge!
So there you have it. If you need photographs or great hair products, give Andrea a shout. Have a great week!
I decided that for the month of November, I am going to spotlight some of the women in my life that run businesses or have “side gigs” that have made an impact on my life. Why? Because yesterday (10/31) as I was getting ready for the day I realized that most of the items that I use on a daily basis come from women run businesses and I want to support them!
The following November posts will NOT be paid ads. I’m not going to give them a shout out if I don’t use or have the product. I’m not even seeking the women out ahead of time and telling them that I’m doing this. However, if any of these awesome ladies have discount codes they want to share, I’ll post them.
So here we go. I think this will be fun!
The first shout out goes to my daughter Maddieand Young Living. When Maddie went to college, she took with her all of her health issues and struggles. Yes, duh. Of course she did. But instead of allowing chronic illness and a body that is at war everyday to define her experience; she thrived. Truly, against all odds, she was healthier away at college, living in a dorm that she had ever been. And I attribute a lot of it to her finding Young Living that first fall and signing up as a monthly member. In doing so, she made a commitment to her health and opened our world to the “Ditch and Switch” mindset. That first year we became “oily” and friend of a friend, Angela and her Essentially Sage Advice mentored our journey as I quickly became a member and fell in love with the all natural products.
My Top Pick: Thieves
If you haven’t ever tried Thieves, you are missing out. There is a lot of research about its cleansing abilities and you can look into that if interested. Some of the Thieves products I use are: the hand sanitizer, the hand soap, the fruit and veggie wash, the detergents, the cough drops, and the oil.
I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the mix of Clove, Orange and Thieves. Well, really, I love Thieves mixed with any citrus, but these 3 are my go to smell around the house for fall.
Bottom line.. Thieves makes everything better.
And there you have it. I never imaged that my house would be filled with oils and oily products. But we are all in over here. If you have any questions, let me know. I can get you in touch with Maddie or Angela. I have not regretted a single purchase and am committed to my Essential Rewards Membership as my family has benefitted from it beyond my wildest dreams.
Check back in a couple of days for my next November Spotlight.
For years I thought that in order to share my passion for life, art and creative things I had to make everything “Good Enough”.. in other words.. Perfect. I knew that perfection wasn’t attainable, but I struggled to make things as perfect as possible. My head would not allow my heart’s creative efforts to flourish because I couldn’t move beyond the mindset that my work wasn’t good enough. I wasn’t talented enough. I just wasn’t…. enough.
But I realized that the only way my children, and my students for that matter, would learn to share their work, their passions, and enjoy creative pursuits would be to see me sharing my life and my creative effort as well.
So finally at age 45, I came to an understanding that while my personality type drives perfection and reward, I do not have to be defined by that. More, I determined to no longer live in that trap. I decided that I would rather have peace than perfection.
That’s why I started sharing my paintings last year. Do I think they are perfect, nope. Do I see every flaw, every mistake, every missed opportunity. YES. But I am choosing to move beyond the never ending quest for perfection and am instead enjoying the process.
It’s hard. Every. Single. Time. There is something so incredibly personal about putting artwork out for public consumption. It’s weird. I’ve given speeches and preached sermons, presented at conferences and workshops, and have published articles about art and teaching, but none of those things feel as personal and defining as my music compositions, my playwriting, and my artwork.
And that is why the creative process is magical. When we go through the creative process, we leave something of ourselves in the work. In doing so, we have to come to a point where we say that just as we are, we are good enough. And that is hard. But when we come to that point, it is oh, so freeing.
And that is why I share my work. It’s my coming to terms with the fact that my work will never “be good enough.” After almost 25 years in education, and a lifetime in the arts, I have a firm grasp on the fact that I am not a natural talent. But I have so much drive and desire and a willingness to learn! And maybe that is the real lesson in the art.
I don’t have to be perfect, or a natural talent. In the grand scheme of life, most of us aren’t that slim percentage of natural talent. I just have to want to create, be willing to learn and more than that, be willing to fail as I find my wings. I know it’s trite. But you know, that’s kind of where I am these days. Letting go of the pursuit of perfection has allowed me to find my wings, my voice, and most importantly, my peace.
Global Competence is not a topic that I have spent much time pondering over the last 40 or so years.
Thankfully, I grew up in an environment where different cultures were embraced and often people who didn’t look like me or speak the same language as my family would come for meals or spend a few days in our home. As an adult, I’ve lived in a number of different places and have very much enjoyed learning about different groups of people. My sisters have adopted children from different cultures, countries, and backgrounds and our family is better for the differences. As our family has grown, so has our mosaic.
But as a teacher, I don’t know that I have done a very good job teaching with a global mindset. So much of what I had to do on a daily basis was to teach a set of skills. If the skill and culture collided, I used it. As an art teacher, I loved teaching about the Huichol Indians. As a theatre teacher, I love teaching about 6 forms of Japanese theatre. But I’m asking myself now, how can I do better?
Why now? Well, in my new job as an Instructional Designer for a Tarleton State University, I have had the opportunity to jump into my new environment and start learning! This past week I attended a virtual conference for Non-Land-Grant Agriculture and Renewable Resources Universities. (#NARRU) I didn’t have to, but I wanted to. My personality type is to read, ask, research and learn! So I attended and wow. I may not have had a clue about a lot of what they said, but what I did get, I’m ready to use.
The first day’s professional development portion was over inclusion. As I listened, I couldn’t help but think back on students that I have had over the last 20 years that desperately needed someone to advocate for them. I advocated for them the best that I knew how, and I’m proud of my efforts, but my heart aches for all of the missed opportunities.
Here are a few takeaways from Dr. Shannon Archibeque-Engle and Dr. Antomia Farrell
If we want to break barriers, and have real conversations, we need to have small targeted groups that encourage participation. No one wants to be the one person that talks. No one wants to be the one singled out. No one wants to be the “poster child. “
Inclusion happens with engagement, transparency and truth telling.
Recruitment isn’t the answer, retention is.
So, I’m taking these ideas and thinking of my personal life and our experience. I have to say, those four ideas hit home. But that was really just a start. The drumming in my head began as a soft tap and with day two of the conference, it became a loud thump.
As someone that is determined that her children will grow up to view the world as a large mosaic, full of needed colors and textures and patterns, I was intrigued by the four domains. While yes, I want my children to be travelers, I want them to be more than just takers. I want them to take action!
If future leaders, teachers and politicians have the chance to investigate the world beyond their immediate environment, recognize that their viewpoint is not the only perspective in the world, can communicate with people that are from different backgrounds, cultures and speak different languages, and then will to take action to better the world.. man, I want to be a part of that movement!
And so where do we start? Well, thankfully, Dr. Miller Foster gave a framework for that as well. We don’t have to send our children (or ourselves) across the world without preparation. She suggests a stair step approach.
Away (not local, but not out of the country)
Abroad (across a border…)
Why is this important? Because only 42% of Americans have passports and of that 42% I wonder how many have used their passport for more than just tourism in well curated places? I’ve traveled some, have been to a number of different countries, and have experienced a semester in a study abroad program.. but I would count myself in the group that still need to focus on awareness and learn at home!
I live in a community that has layered diversity hidden in the whiteness. I so want to broaden my world and that of my children. So I’m going to start looking, and learning, and advocating for inclusive practices in my community. And then I’m going to start looking a little further out and increase my circle so that eventually my family will be ready to cross a border for more than an all-inclusive beach front vacay.
It’s an interesting conundrum.. when life is good, it’s hard to sit down and write/blog about it. But when life is hard, it is soo very easy to let it pour out. Well, 2020 has been a weird year, for all of us, but for me personally it has been a really good year, and that makes it hard to write about as I know so many people are suffering.
But this is my diary to the world and so, let me catch you up on a few of the good things in our life.
Doug’s company, McLemore Financial Group has held its own during this crazy time. Like all families that own businesses, the first few weeks of the pandemic along with the stock market volatility had us ready to panic. But Doug is really good at what he does and all has been well. I’d love to say more, but I haven’t a clue.. he does his thing and I just appreciate it immensely. 🙂
One really cool things that he has done during this time is to transition to working from home a couple of days a week. It’s been good for all of us and he has been able to get out and walk more and find time to relax and write.
2. I heard God.
In January, I heard God. I know it’s weird. But I did, and I have spent the last 10 months relishing the voice of God in my life in a way that was altogether new and different.
I have always believed in God and would say that I have a strong faith. Over the years even when nothing seemed to work out, when life was beyond difficult and miracles were desperately needed yet nothing would happen, I still believed. Through it all, I believed that God was there and would show up.. in His time. Well, in January, God broke through and showed up mightily in our life. The miracles that God brought about were amazing and truly the “only God” kind. Since those early January days, I have walked in anticipation of what God will do each day and have asked God continually to fall fresh on me and to fill me with the His peace. I have had so much fun journaling and sharing personally with others about the presence of God.
3. Kylie and Lexi changed schools and both are THRIVING! Hallelujah. You know, it’s really hard to change things when you are so invested in something. Taking the girls out of the school district that we had been a part of for more than 20 years was difficult. SISD was great for Maddie. She had her group and it was a good fit. But it was never a good fit for Lexi and Kylie was starting to struggle within the system as well. So after years of discussion, in July, we finally decided that with the COVID closures and all of the uncertainty of the fall schedule, that this would be the right time.
And oh, how right we were. Kylie is going to a small private school in town (White Horse Christian Academy) and Lexi is attending an online high school (James Madison High School).The environments are polar opposites from each other, but exactly the right fit for each child. We knew the girls weren’t doing well the last couple of years in the previous school system, but watching Lexi come back to life is heartbreaking, and thrilling, at the same time. Both are being challenged academically, yet have more free time than before. Kylie’s comment was pretty blunt. She asked, after the first week at her new school, while having a late Friday morning breakfast since her school doesn’t have class on Fridays… “why is it that good schools have shorter days and more time off, and bad schools have longer days and have to go more days?” I didn’t have a child-friendly answer
4. I changed jobs!
After years of hurt, disappointment and dead-ends, I came to terms with the fact that promotions and career opportunities outside of the art classroom were not going to be tied to the school district that I had served for so long. I prayed continuously about my desire to lead and organize. I asked God to remove my passion for planning and improvement beyond the classroom setting, if I wasn’t going to be given an opportunity to use my gifts.
It was a hurt that was bone deep.
Then, as July was coming to a close and the anxiety of being thrust into a face to face teaching scenario in the midst of the pandemic had our family scrambling and looking at family medical leave paperwork, God opened the most unexpected door.
Out of the blue, Tarleton State University was looking to hire Instructional Designers. It was a shock. The university had just faced a reorganization and had been forced to layoff employees due to COVID. Things were in a state of change, and yet, Instructional Designers were needed. I applied and was interviewed almost immediately. I was hired and was able to walk away from teaching high school the day before I was to return to the campus full-time. This was a miracle. And everyday I am grateful and thankful. The very gifts that made me “too much” in my old environment are now being used on a daily basis. Four years ago I prayed that God would change me. He didn’t. You see, I was told by the top administrator that in order to be a leader in the district, I had to be.. and I quote “more doe-eyed and to stop having good ideas.” But God made me with a personality that asks questions and a thirst for brainstorming and coming up with creative solutions. So while the path has been arduous to get here, I am so incredibly thankful. Every single day, over the last almost two months now, I have been challenged to ask the questions, to brainstorm for ways to do things and given the autonomy to fix the issues that I find. No longer am I made to feel like I am “too much.” After more than twenty years in education, I have finally found home.
And that’s the recap for the big stuff.
But what about Maddie? Maddie is doing great! She is thriving in college and learning to navigate the world of complicated medical issues and adulthood. Her resiliency is amazing and her strength inspiring.
But in case you think it’s all been easy…
In March, Kylie broke both arms in a tumble from trying to carry her bike down some concrete stairs… and Lexi spent January-March having kidney stones, surgery and stents and then shingles!
Thankfully, those days are behind us.
In the days ahead, I am hoping to blog again. Transitions are always hard, even great ones.
My goal for the next couple of months for myself is to start painting again. And this time, with no expectation, and a less critical eye.
Over the last few months life has been shook up. It started with a rattle and then the quake began. If you had asked me back in December what 2020 would be like, I would have never guessed this. But the reality is that none of us would have foretold our spring to look like it did.
And for our family, while we have had some tough bouts, we have weathered the storms really well. I don’t say that lightly as I know there are so many out there who have lost family members and friends, who have lost livelihoods, who have lost faith.
I feel incredibly privileged that during these last few months I have been able to be at home with my family. We have been tucked away in our safe little boat while the storm has raged around us.
But being safe in our boat has not blinded us to the plight of others. If anything, we are more aware of those around us that don’t have any boat at all. And it’s because of that knowledge that I can’t just sit on the deck of my boat and tan myself and pretend that things are just going to get better.
As a teacher, I struggled through the spring trying to connect with students. So much of what I do as an art teacher on a daily basis is emotional. It’s connections. It’s face to face feedback and prodding and pushing students outside of their comfort zones. Many people think that teaching art is just lots of “fun” while we “just cut paper and color.” The reality is that much of what I do is forcing students to look at life from a different perspective. It’s challenging students to rethink everything they have been taught to believe about life and color and situations and draw/reflect on actual observation, not what they “think they see.”
Not having real interactions with students for the last 12 weeks of the spring semester left me feeling off and out of touch as I could see from the glimpse of their faces on zoom meetings that my students were struggling and hurting.
And these struggles and hurts didn’t just go away when they turned in their last assignment and called the school year over. Over the last few weeks I’ve seen students voice hurts and fears and frustrations. And I don’t have any platitudes. I don’t have any answers.
I’ve been listening.
I’ve been learning.
I’ve been loving.
That’s all I can do. As a teacher, I am struggling right now trying to figure out my place, my voice, and my role in not just the Black Lives Matter movement but the Pride movement as well. I live in a community that is staunchly conservative and quite vocally Republican. I am listening for words of affirmation, love and support for BLM and Pride, but the silence is deafening. And I am broken because of it.
So here is my promise to my students, my family, my community:
There is a seat at my table for you. Not just any seat, but a reserved seat of honor with your name on the card.
There is seat at my table for you. Whether you are privileged or under-privileged. Whether you are white or a person of color. Whether you are straight or LGBTQIA+. Whether you are liberal or conservative.
No matter the label. No matter how much space you take up physically, emotionally or mentally. No matter if you bring a dish to share or come empty handed.
There is a place for you.
You are wanted. You are valuable. You are loved.
I know that in the past I have been too busy getting things done and focused on the next contest or goal. But I promise you this.
From this day forward, your heart, your peace, and your life are my priority.
With much love,
Here is a time lapse of the watercolor tree painting seen above. I was going to draw the tree, but I found this amazing cut file on Etsy and bought it as it was perfect. May you remember that we need all of the colors on the color wheel to fully enjoy life.
This post is going to seem odd or a little “out there” if you haven’t read Untamed by Glennon Doyle or Fierce, Free and Full of Fire by Jen Hatmaker.. but that’s okay. Maybe my real and raw manifesto might encourage you to go read these books!
First, let me say that these are my words inspired by these books, but I would have never put my thoughts in such a real and hardcore philosophy without each of these authors first showing the way. I journal and over the years in blog posts, I have spoken these truths in fits and spurts, but I’ve never felt challenged to uncage my thoughts, emotions and dreams in one complete essay.
So while I don’t imagine that Glennon nor Jen will ever see this post (a girl can dream.. and if I’m throwing out dreams, can I add Rachel Hollis to this too….) I want to say how much their work inspires me. And not just the books that prompted this manifesto, but each of their bodies of work. And really, so many other women writers. Brene’ Brown, Lysa TerKeurst, Rachel Held Evans, Nadia Bolz-Weber, Jamie Wright, Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith, Shauna Niequist and others. These ten women authors have helped me to find my voice in a world that seems to reward women for keeping quiet.
And yes, I know that some of you immediately laughed at the idea of me keeping quiet. I’m not loud, but I’ve always spoken up about injustice or have a compelling truth that needs to be said. It makes people uncomfortable, so I have learned to soften the words with smiles and deferential actions. To lessen who I am so that others aren’t offended or feel offensive.
But no more. I have decided that I am worthy of acceptance and love. I have been created for a purpose and I believe after much soul searching that my role is that of a truth-teller. I am still learning how to speak truths in a more loving way, but I refuse to keep my personality and gifts caged because it makes others uncomfortable.
Okay, I’ve gone off on a tangent…. back to my manifesto…
But first… here are more pictures from my “modeling shoot” with my girls. Lexi and Kylie did their best to get me in decent poses… I’m a pretty pathetic model. But we laughed a lot. My skirt and shoes are animal print… because I am a CHEETAH and I refuse to be tamed. (Go read Glennon’s book…)
And finally… the manifesto.
I am like the wind. There are seasons where I am a gentle breeze, going along with life and just waiting for my chance to do my work. At other times, I am a gale force wind, blowing hard, juggling dozens of deadlines and furiously pushing others to do their part. I am wired this way. It may seem like I am all or nothing, but really it’s my core value of refusing to be stagnant and wanting to learn something new everyday that keeps me changing my speed and direction. With age, I am learning to find the balance in a gentle breeze and a turbulent wind. I am exactly enough the way God made me. The world needs my gentleness and my strength, my new ideas and my take charge attitude.
I am strong in my bodyand my fierce determination has given me the ability to run marathons, compete in triathlons and birth children. I have not been kind to my body. I have starved it. I’ve punished it with exercise. I have hated it. I have loathed the sight of my thighs since 6th grade. But I’m learning. My body is strong enough to blaze new trails, to climb mountains, to fight off failure, despair, and even worse, complacency. I’m learning to love her. Slowly. I still don’t like a lot of her qualities, but I’m learning that she is kind and faithful and worthy. Just as she is.
What I need are opportunities to use my strengths, my collaborative gifts and my voice of truth. I deserve goodness and to be treated fairly and without dismissiveness. I need the chance to see my dreams validated and my attention to detail honored. I need help learning how to advocate for myself in a way that doesn’t dismiss the ability of others. I need more connection with parents of children the same age of youngest daughter as she need friends and I need community.
What I want is to be needed and acknowledged. I dream of using my gift of organizing people and things on a larger scale than simply my home and classroom! I want to chose my yes and not feel stuck, stagnant, or forgotten. I want my voice of truth to be not just allowed, but a desired commodity.
I believe is that God is listening and I hope with all that is within me He has a purpose for the gifts that He has given me; and that this purpose has a path towards my dreams. I believe in spiritual curiosity and want to learn more about predestination and freewill. I believe in equality, that all lives matter. But that the only way all lives matter, is if the freedom of those oppressed and targeted is fought for by those who take those freedoms for granted. I believe in creating safe spaces for teenagers to question everything about themselves, their identity, and their orientation.
I connect with others through service. I enjoy getting to know others while we serve side by side and hand in hand. I want to connect with honesty. I want to ask difficult questions and learn from others authentic answers. I want to be offered that same space. I want to connect without drama, pretense, or expectations. I want to value my connection to others and know that others value me.
At the end of my life, I want to be able to point to countless moments of connection, service and creative thought. I want to finish my days knowing that I spent it all, and all that is left is a light breeze of remembrance.